The Expendables stars several big screen action heroes, past their primes, in what may be their last big roles.

It also stars small screen sensation, Jason Statham.

Dare I see The Expendables on the big screen and risk my love for Statham, whom I have only ever seen on the television?

You can see the difficulty in this decision.

I woke up yesterday morning feeling like I had been punched in the eye. I rubbed my eye and a clump of eyelashes came out. I freaked out, stared at my eye in the magnifying mirror for a lot of minutes and went online to check my symptoms.

Oh, it’s just a stye. A STYE!? I think the last time I had any kind of infection in my eye, I was a very, very small child. And it wasn’t the dreaded Pink Eye, either. I’m pretty sure this is from wearing my contact lenses too long and not cleaning them well enough. So, I’m wearing my regular glasses and doing warm compresses on my eye, and it’s swollen but it doesn’t hurt as much as it did yesterday. I think I’m winning this battle and won’t have to go to the doctor.

It did not affect my movie going experiences on Saturday, when I saw Toy Story 3 AND Inception. They were both TOTALLY AWESOME. As I was discussing with my brother, though they may not seem similar on the surface, they both explore similar themes of love, loss, and moving on. It’s just that one is a movie about make-believe and daring escapes… and the other also has, um, daring escapes and make-believe.

I don’t know what got me on this train of thought, but it might have been watching the end of ‘Little Darlings’ this morning followed by ‘Amelie.’ As I was hanging up some laundry, I thought of all the male characters in movies that I found attractive, and how none of them were the typical ones; I didn’t like Blaine or Ducky (I liked Stef), I liked Bender (Breakfast Club), I didn’t like Mouth or Mikey or Brand (I liked Data), but the truth is that I never was attracted to those kinds of guys in Real Life. Only one type attracted me, ever.

My male ideal is Jack Butler, the dad from ‘Mr. Mom’, played by Michael Keaton. Not Michael Keaton himself – but the character he played. This is very important to specify because… I basically ended up marrying him.

Here are the qualities in no particular order:
- Silly
- Family-focused
- Does housework
- Smart
- DIY capable
- Likes soap operas under certain circumstances
- Loves his job
- Plays card games
- Tries to relate to people outside of his socio-economic sphere
- Eats junk food
- Can make costumes
- Loves me the most

I got Perfect Tommy. Hooray!

The following people & things have influenced me in some way:
- Tracy Ullman
- Quentin Tarantino
- Robotech
- Starblazers
- Modernism
- Charlie Teske
- Oasis
- Blondie
- Courtney Love
- Mr. Mom (starring Michael Keaton)
- The Last Starfighter
- Superman
- Magazines
- The Internet
- Andrew Wyeth
- The RZA
- Xena: Warrior Princess
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer
- Kurt Busiek
- Feminism
- My brother, Nathan Smith
- Wonder Woman
- Liars
- John Irving
- Stephen Fry
- Rachel Pollack
- House, M.D.
- Vampires

And that’s just some of them. The actual list is much, much longer.

Rachel’s comment, from the post below:

Just so everyone knows, Leira was indeed born to Empire Strikes Back. My labor went so fast we didn’t make it through the entire movie. So fast, my actual doctor didn’t deliver the baby. I believe they had to bring in the ER doctor. INTENSE.

I’m an Aunt. It’s official. I’ve kind of been a lower-case aunt for Sam, but this feels very different than when he was born. Leira is someone who I feel a real sense of duty towards and thank goodness that the Kleins came to visit over the weekend because I would have been a ball of guilt and anxiety without them around to distract me. It’s kind of settling in now and I really wish I could be there with Rachel, even though I would just be a seat filler.

Poor Arrow was really thrown for a loop with other people in the house. She seems to be recovering nocely today, Tom took her out to the ranchito for a run with the desert dogs, and she’s muddy and happy and napping.

We had a lot of fun having our BFFs over – they hadn’t seen the house since we just moved in, so they could see all the work that’s been done and reminded us that we’ve actually gotten a bit finished. Also, Annika is proving that pregnancy is a very good look for her, yet again. Sam is proving that age 3 is a strange, yet, simple age and that you must take the time to assess the situation. And Will is proving that beer is a breakfast food and whiskey is for dessert, and that Nick Cage movies are always worth watching.

Tom managed to cook breakfast for all of us and prove that you can, in fact, use a pancake mix and rely on technique for the World’s Best Pancakes.

I’m sure I proved something or other, but what it could have been, I have no idea. I have fallen into watching the “Later… with Jools Holland” marathon on Ovation (a show that I have never seen before) and I’ve bookmarked the Wikipedia page for it. I will be searching for video of that past 33 series in the coming months, I suspect. Oh, live performances, I don’t need to like that band or that song, but I never get to see bands anymore, so I’m starved for it. UKers, you have no idea how lucky you are to have had this show.

Oh, and we watched the movie Hot Rod on Saturday. If you haven’t seen it, you should. It is very funny and I am a fan!