I am a very intolerant person.

Things I will not tolerate:
- Sexism
- Homophobia/Transphobia
- Racism
- Bigotry
- Bigamy
- Social Conservatives
- Meritocracy
- Theocracy
- Plutocracy
- Oligarchy
- Monarchy
- Wal*Mart
- Missionaries

Sorry, but I’m just tired of the kinds of people that subscribe to these ideas telling me (and everyone else I know) that we have to be just like them. Go fuck yourselves. I disagree. I am not changing my mind and I don’t have to listen to you, but should you insist on talking at me about these things as positives or the way things should be, I will call you on it – I will call you a racist, sexist, bigoted, homophobic un-American asshole, ask you to leave, and then I will turn up The Clash really loud.

1. Bongo
2. Mr. Pooflinger
3. Jerry
4. Sharon
5. Jeeves
6. Mr. Bojangles
7. Babble
8. Hattie
9. Victoria
10. Ponch

- Telemarketer
- Loan Officer
- Secretary in a dentist’s office
- Bank teller
- Car valet
- Insurance adjuster
- Landlord
- Plumber

Pork Pie
Derby
Bowler
Cowboy
Bonnet
Beret
Kippah/Yarmulke
Top
Tam

These are people who, for the most part, sit behind a desk, shuffle papers and read a teleprompter, and should be taken off the air. I’m not including sports anchors or weather people, because then I’d never stop typing.

Peter Alexander – Wants to be Anderson Cooper (they even photoshopped him to look like AC!). Unfortunately, he’s a stiff, boring, and cliched reporter.

Brian Williams – He’s all the worst bits of the old news anchors rolled up into a new, worse kind of news anchor.

Tamara Damante – A local news anchor who really needs lessons in reading the news. Emphasizes all the wrong things when she speaks. Smiles at the end of tragic or bad news stories.

Sam Shane - What a douche. Seriously. I’ve seen him co-host a morning show and be a news anchor, and he’s a fucking nightmare. Makes inappropriate commentary on almost every story.